"mad at myself"

so our girl has taken to her dad's iphone. she loves to look at the pictures and watch the videos we've taken of her. (she's actually slightly better at navigating this phone than her dad!) she knows how to push the button to turn on the screen, slide to unlock and navigate to the pictures. she then searches for the little arrows on pictures indicating videos. we have several of them, but there were a few that we cherished. ones that made us laugh no matter how many times we saw them, or those that were just very sweet.

yes, that's right, there "were" a few.

seems elsie also knows how to delete. well, she knows how to delete but has no idea she's doing it. so we're scrolling through last night and determine that one of our favorites has been lost. oh dear. so we had a family meeting about this. maybe not a family meeting. more like, "oh no, elsie you deleted one of our favorites." her response to this was as follows:

"i'm so mad at myself."
"i'm going to write that down."
"and send it to my gramma so she can write it down, too."

after my giggles subsided we had a quick lesson about seeing a garbage can on the screen of the phone when looking at pictures...and we'll be better about getting them to the computer.

my giggle for the day

elsie's become a big fan of taylor swift. she's even learning the words to her songs. she seems young for this but it could be worse (enter justin bieber, the latest obsession of a sweet girl in elsie's dance class). so she says to me today, "i wish taylor swift was my mom." she wasn't mad at me and didn't say it in anger or anything. just honesty. made me giggle. i guess i can't really blame her.

family pictures

my parents sprung for family pictures for their kiddos this year as a christmas gift. as much as i hate having my picture taken (as many of you know), it was probably time since the last round we did was when i was 12 and i had horrible 80's bangs. horrible, seriously! (this is where i should insert such a picture but, well, i don't have one. honestly, i don't. i wouldn't keep that sort of treasure from you!) the kind where the top half stands erect in a roll and the bottom half rests on your forehead. nothing cute about this. why didn't someone tell me?



i digress. so these photos were very important to my parents, since their family has grown quite a bit since i was 12 and bryan at 15. boy am i glad we did this. (thanks parents!) if you are considering a family photo session, please talk with tara malouf (red thread photo). she's amazing. she shot kayley's wedding and her pics are beautiful (of course, kayley's a beautiful girl so that was going to happen anyway).



she captured some great pics of my mom and dad, and of my brother's family and his beautiful girls. but of course my favorite is one of elsie being, um, elsie:

anyway, if you want to see some of the others, well you can find them here. keep the comments clean people, this is family-friendly!

simple toys

i'm sitting in my kitchen with my kiddo and my husband. i'm telling charles "gee, she just seems like such a big girl to me all of a sudden." i've had the pleasure of spending quite a bit of time with her over last couple of weeks so i'm wondering if that's why she seems like a 'big kid' to me 'all of a sudden'. that makes me sad for a different reason.

so as i'm saying this to charles, elsie is digging in the lazy susan that houses lots of containers and lids, but none that fit with each other. she finds the salad spinner and wants to know how it works. her dad shows her with great enthusiasm. elsie runs to find some toys that clearly need a ride on the "salad spinner". this makes me giggle and then i'm thinking, 'well, maybe she's still got lots of little kiddo left in her." as i'm having this thought, charles is the one spinning the toys in the salad spinner with big belly laughs.

okay, is my girl getting to be a big kid or is my husband becoming a child?

and so it begins.

so i'm a christmas tree snob.

there, i said it. i like fancy christmas trees. white lights, pretty ribbon, red berries, sparkly ornaments that match. and i like my wrapping paper to match my tree, with fancy ribbon and big bows that i enjoy making myself. i'm not shy about admitting this.

charles and i are very lucky to have 2 trees in our house each year because we get them for free, chopping them down from our friends' property (thank you marty & denise!) who will need to cut them down anyway to build someday. one of them is 12 feet tall. yes, that's right, 12 feet. (how spoiled are we?) and they are adorned with lots of white lights, sparkling gold, red and amber ornaments, silk ribbon, and all kinds of pretty things we've acquired over the time we've been together. they are my happy place this time of year. my friends even affectionately poke fun at me for my trees. janna recently texted me, "i need to make an appointment with you to see your trees."

i recall the christmas trees we had when i was a child. multi-colored lights. macrame ornaments of varying colors and shapes made by my grandmother. shapes that never made sense to me or even looked like christmas. beaded ornaments with cheesy pictures of me and my brother glued in the center. then there were the lovely decorations my brother and i made at school. those red and green construction paper structures with visible dried glue globs and random glitter in places that made no sense for glitter to reside. terrible silver garland wrapped around the tree as if it was attempting to strangle the last bit of life from the already-tortured shrub. don't even get me started on what was our tree topper.

i vowed i would NEVER have a tree like this in my house.

i'm a christmas tree snob after all.

.............until now.

on wednesday, elsie came home with this adorable little bag she'd decorated at school as one of her holiday projects. very cute, and she was very proud of it. "look!" so i opened the bag and inside were a few surprises for us. the first was one of her letters (she's learning to write letters by tracing lines on large pages pre-printed with the lower case letter. she's getting pretty good, too.) another construction paper cutout decorated with glued-on things. and then there it was.

a snowman. white construction paper cut in the shape of a snowman, then glued to a......... tongue depressor! (gasp!) cotton had been pulled apart and glued to his body representing the snow. a yarn scarf, brown construction paper hat, GOOGLY eyes and even a carrot nose completed the little guy. "oh, elsie, he's adorable! good job!"

and then it happened. charles said to me, "it should go on the tree."

what?!? you must be joking. that tree? our beautiful christmas tree? um, i think not.

i lost. the snowman won without even trying. he was resting on a branch before i could even form words....

turns out, i love him. so it begins. the building of our new christmas tree, which will take years to complete and which will likely repulse my daughter when she's 15, swearing she'll never have a tree like this in her house. ever.

we'll see about that.

some days....

.....i just feel very fortunate. very loved, very full, and very fortunate. i'm ashamed to admit that i sometimes forget this. especially lately. i can get caught up in what's tough about life and feel anxious and down. (i'm working on this.)

but then i get a reminder. sometimes it's a small gesture by my daughter, like when she wraps her arms around my neck and says, "i love you" for no particular reason other than that's what she's feeling at that moment. or when my husband reaches over and touches my shoulder and it still makes me feel giddy.

but sometimes it comes more like a giant bear hug from life...........a big, warm bear hug that makes me feel very loved. very full, very fortunate, and very loved.

haircut #2

two posts in the same day - i'm making up for my gap in posts.

last tuesday, i took elsie for her 2nd haircut. her first was last december. can you believe that? well, when you have a kid who remains bald for the first year and half of her life, you don't have an occasion to cut her hair. but now....well, it's a different story.

she's blessed with her dad's long, beautiful eyelashes and curly hair. lucky girl. but when you don't maintain those tresses, she looks a mess. so i took her for a haircut to trim up the bottom and maybe do some layers. the stylist quickly informed me that her hair is so thin still that layers would make her look bald again. okay, let's just trim it up so she gets a little more comfortable with the cutting process.

when we arrived, we had about a 15 minute wait. elsie was just fine, seemed perfectly at ease. then they called her name.

uh-oh.

after about five minutes (literally, five) she finally agreed to "go see" the fancy chair. i put her right into the booster on the fancy chair and she settled in nicely. wrapped in a cape, the stylist began cutting. elsie was a champ. and now she's got a very cute little cut to show for it. we're trying to grow out her bangs, so it still looks a little unkept...but cute all the same.

what is that!!??!!

i got one for ya. wednesday before last, i pick elsie up after school. pull into the drive, sign her out, and greet her with open arms. she's wearing her puffy vest but we're in a hurry so i strap her into the car, vest still on. "i wanna take off my coat!" okay, unbuckle enough to get the vest off and toss it on the seat next to her, buckle up again and off we go! pulling out of the driveway, i'm reaching behind me to hand off bunny while watching traffic pass by, as we do every day. there's a hesitation back there so i turn to check on her.

there's something on her, resting on her chest where the car seat straps across her. no way it can be what i think it is. "what is that?????" i exclaim, adding to the silent panic already spread across her face. oops, mommy keep it in check. okay, i've got to pull over.

there is just simply no possible way that can be what i think it is. calm down, it's just leaf. i throw open my door, run around the car to the back door and open it. i look at my girl, who is still in a panic and looking at me to fix it. she's not saying anything and seems to be holding her breath. i look down at the object. sure enough, sitting on my girl, bottom facing up..........

..........an octopus.

yes, that's right. a perfectly intact, dark red octopus about the size of the palm of my hand. obviously dead, its arms fixed spread out like a star fish, suction cups staring back at me. it was either on her shirt hiding under her vest, or it fell off of her vest during removal just a minute ago. normally there is no way i would touch this thing but mommy instinct took over. i grabbed that thing and chucked it on the side of the road. "ok elsie, no big deal," play it off like it was a leaf.

back in the car and off we go. "so elsie, did you have sharing in your classroom today?" yes but not that. hmmm, i'm at a loss. we go home, change her out of the shirt that now had octopus goo on it (along with bunny, who immediately had a bath), and she goes down for a nap. she seemed just fine and not traumatized by the experience, which is more than i can say for myself. did that really just happen?

so while my girl is asleep, i talk to charles and relay this crazy story to him. "you have to go to the school and find that thing because no one will believe me.......and i've littered, which i'm feeling very guilty about."

he's such a good sport, stops by the school and finds the little guy on the side of the road. "yep, it sure is an octopus." he took it into the school and brought it to their attention. they launch an "investigation" asking all of the teachers if the "specimen" looked familiar. now i should say that by this time, charles and i had sort of decided, after much discussion, that it was probably someone's lunch. hard to imagine it wouldn't be cut up and stuffed into a baggie or plastic container, but what do i know about sending octopus in a child's lunch? i wanted to be respectful of this and not blow it out of proportion. i mean i wouldn't want someone reacting this way to elsie's peanut butter sandwich.

i got a call from the director of the school. i spoke at length with elsie's teacher. they were clearly taking this very seriously and wanted to get to the bottom of things. we had no idea where it came from. elsie is very sensitive about things, especially right now, not wanting to walk past a wall that's harboring a mosquito. they were worried that she would relate school with......well an octopus.

in the end, elsie's teacher showed the little guy to one of the parents (well, many, many parents) stating that it was found in a classroom. one of the parents recognized it as an item they have in their house for grown-ups to snack on, not the children of the house as it's a choking hazard. no one knows how he ventured to school but we can all imagine the child's fascination with it, picking it up to bring along, something mom and dad get but not me. or perhaps it accidentally stuck to the child's lunchbox while in the kitchen of the home and hung on for the ride, eventually landing on elsie's vest. pickled though, so never living.

anyway, makes for a very interesting story, and it all belongs to my girl.

halloween!

halloween with her bff, sophie!

elsie is a ballerina, sophie is fancy nancy. fabulous!

demonstrating some ballet.....

i sooooo wish i could take credit for these amazing little kitty pumpkins,

but this is all amanda. well done my friend, well done! gotta learn to keep up with the woods.

time to get the show on the road and get ourselves some candy!

trying to take a picture of the back of her head proves very difficult.

her hair just turned out so cute and i wanted to capture it!

this is frenchy, fancy nancy's dog. salish was such a good sport about this, i could not believe it! i thought for sure he would chew these things up instantly, but it turns out he kept it on for us. finally had to remove it when he decided to lift his leg and his tutu got in the way. oops, didn't plan for that!

second prize for pumpkin. doesn't beat the kitties, but it's a good one. can't take credit for this one either. it belongs to our newlywed neighbors, first stop for trick-or-treating.

"i'm getting pretty good at this candy-collecting business!"

this is one of our neighbors, caroline. most fabulous costume ever - peacock. she found it in a catalog and asked her mom for it. three years ago. leanne finally caved this year and got it for her. she was beautiful, she's a fabulous kid and loves our girls to pieces. absolute gem of a family!

It was great fun to watch the girls, their first official halloween together. it marks our first anniversary actually, of meeting peter, amanda and sophie. last year's halloween is a fabulous memory for us - the girls became fast friends that night and we made some new friends, too, who have become a very important part of our lives. we are very fortunate.

no more tears

she doesn't cry now when i drop her off at school. it's such a corner turned for us that it brings tears to my eyes. tears of happy! we had a very rough morning today after a rough night of not enough sleep. i let her sleep in a little and she still didn't want to get out of bed. then she cried and had a fit during her bath, actually threw cups full of water at me until i managed to wrestle them away from her. she didn't want to get dressed. after all that, i was sure leaving her at school this morning would be traumatic and i dreaded it since it's been a whole week of no tears at morning drop-off. but no. she got right into line with her classmates, waved goodbye to me and even smiled. sigh.

goodness how i love our girl....

ash-lie

whenever elsie has an itch in her eye, she informs me she has an "ash-lie" in her eye. very funny. every time, no matter how many times she says it. just tickles me.

Pumpkin Patch

We finally made it to the pumpkin patch. We usually accomplish this task much sooner but we put it off this year just being busy with other things. Carving hasn't been done yet, but probably later this week so I'll try to post some pictures of that funny business before Halloween.

Fall City Farms, our usual pumpkin fetching destination:

(just in case when you drove into the farm you missed the giant green field peppered with big, round orange things with stems at the top and seas of families traipsing around in rubber boots with wheelbarrows!)

riding in the pumpkin cart. so fun!

she was very serious about finding the perfect one. or two or three.

mommy, help me!

i can smell the cow from over here!

mmm, apple cider in a pumpkin cup!

I'm also happy to report that our girl is doing better in school these days. Friday was her first day with no tears. None when I pulled into the driveway, none when I walked her inside, none when I left. Sigh. I'm so proud of her! Today is her very first picture day so we picked out a special outfit (okay, I picked it out and gave it to her as a gift for being a good sport about school on Friday - she was no impressed with my "surprise." Oops.) Her classroom is celebrating Harvest this week so she'll be painting a mini pumpkin, carving up a larger one to peer at its insides, partaking in an apple tasting and making apple sauce! So fun!

orcas island

apparently blogging comes in waves for me. sometimes i just can't seem to make the time. my poor girl was sick. it all started back on 9/28 when she woke at 11 p.m. and began throwing up. it lasted until about 10 the next morning. she had a fever and slowly began becoming congested. she had a fever and could hardly breathe through her nose by the end of the day. it ended with antibiotics for a sinus infection and she's still a bit snotty to this day. but she's recovering.

missing school was very hard for her so when she finally returned monday, 10/4, we basically went back to square one. the good news is that her bff sophie began at her school that day so we walk in with her and amanda every day. i think it helps.

so we celebrated four years of wedded bliss on 10/7 and decided to take a long weekend as a family. we left for orcas island on saturday, 10/9, just for a two night stay. it was lovely. elsie still wasn't feeling 100% but she was ready for some fun since she'd been forced to hang at home so much when she was sick.

watching the approach for stop at lopez. she loves going on the ferry boat. "big, big boat!"

my beautiful girl, enjoying the ride.

drove out to rosario for a quick visit on our way to moran state park and mount constitution. this deer was so friendly, let elsie walk right up to him. unreal.

mount constitution. incredible view. i forget to fix the saturation on these pics and when i load them to the blog, they fade. take my word for it, it's beautiful.

always a silly smile for the camera. school pictures will be interesting.

some art in town that elsie was very impressed with.

the museum. shame on us, didn't go inside.....

this was a much prettier picture before i uploaded it.... loses something here but i like it.

love this little wooden chapel behind our inn.

view from our room. beautiful. to see and to hear.

catching a nap. had to talk her into it. took about an hour.

yep, view's still there later in the day.

not complete without singing "single ladies" once or twice.

she was a great kid and we had a good time. it's fun to travel with her because i tend to see things differently when i'm with her. everything seems incredible through the eyes of a child.

sick.

stomach flu = first school absence today..............

bunny got to go.

bunny (who now she calls "bunny" as often as she calls her "demma") made it to elsie's school with her yesterday. not because bunny was invited or even welcomed by the school, but because when elsie's teacher pulled her from the car, she had an unrelenting death grip on bunny. when teacher tried to pry bunny from her hands, elsie said "no!" through her sobbing and red face. okay, bunny goes.

the good news is that it's really only the departure that poses such anxiety. once inside, she calms after 10 or 15 minutes. she's then fine and seems to be more independent than she was initially, doing her own work, even dancing for the teacher by late afternoon.

still very attached to mommy when not at school, but i think this will get better, too. of course, bunny is still constantly in tow.

day three

with tears in her eyes, "i don't want to go to cool." that was before we left the house. on the way to school, it was "i don't like my cool." sigh. when we arrived in the school's driveway, i turn to see her eyes brimming with tears. she's trying to hold it back but it's coming. by the time she saw the teacher walking toward the car, she was sobbing. mrs. gatchalian opened the door and tried to unbuckle elsie from her car seat, but elsie pushed her hands away and said "no!" my heart was breaking. when the teacher finally freed elsie from her seat, elsie reached out and grabbed a hold of the seat back trying to pull herself back in. she was sobbing uncontrollably and i almost couldn't stop my own tears. i just couldn't let her see me cry. "have fun at school today, i love you." mrs. gatchalian swept elsie away on her hip, carrying her lunchbox in the other hand. swift walk to the front door and they disappear inside. i pull out of the driveway, make a right turn, pull over and sob for five minutes. by far the hardest day of being mommy so far.

rest assured, when i checked on her via the classroom webcam, she was doing just fine. close to the teacher, but not crying. she even pulled out a mat, sat and did some "work."

sigh.

woodland park zoo

we took elsie to woodland park zoo on saturday, 9/18, for the first time. it was a surprise for her after her first week at school. she had no idea where we were, even once we were inside. it was great fun and we had beautiful weather.

loading the pics here diminishes the color - the entrance is really beautiful...

elsie looking at the gorillas!

lil' birdie.

orangutan peeking at elsie from under a potato sack! very cute. and very big!

this little guy came swinging through the branches and crashing up against the glass. scared elsie to pieces and she refused to approach the glass.

the elephants!

oh my gosh, elephants are the best part!

that elephant is this big!

elsie's long-time sign for elephant.

komodo dragon. she didnt like him at all.

we also saw a brown bear and an eagle. so much fun!

she fell asleep ten minutes after getting in the car...